Chapters In a Story [+ VIDEO]

There is a reason why our lives are referred to as stories, it's because we have chapters. New beginnings, intense middles and tearful/happy endings. The chapters we have lived through are always there to re-visit, we can flick the book back to re-read. The memories will always be there, they'll never end, they are alive in words and photographs within the pages, despite being long gone. Those chapters show different people as we grow.

I have grown a lot, but I still look to that ten-year-old version of me; would she be proud of the person I am? Would she approve? Am I following the path she wanted for me? Those people you were in the past are still within you, they make you up, they live on somewhere we can't reach, but we remember them.

Every book ever read, every film ever watched, ever scraped knees, bruises, scars or tea stains are a reminder of something; of who we once were, or what we experienced at that time. I hold myself accountable for being someone who pokes fun at who I used to be. I had glasses, braces, terrible posture, skin and style; a shy little girl who was scared of her own shadow and everyone around her. Because I'm so far from that girl, I can look back and laugh, I've grown so much it really is like two distinct people. I'm now loud, bubbly, eccentric, not afraid of how I dress, what I like, or what I look like. I wish I could give past me the confidence I exude now. Despite all of this, she got me through the hardest times and I thank her in abundance for that. I'm not ashamed of her, I'm proud of, I am her, she is still a part of me, but I feel so disconnected from that version of myself because she is a past chapter, far from the page I'm on now.

I was and still am working to be the best person, and reach my goals. My past selves have done so much for me. Nine years ago, a girl walked through the gates into her first day of Secondary school. Four years ago, a girl got me through GCSE's, Two years ago, a girl got me through A-levels and into my dream university. You are never the person you were yesterday, we should be striving to grow and mature every day. Little changes happen that a few chapters down the line you realise made up big changes in you, you don't realise this until you look back.

When you look at a novel, the pages are full to the brim of adventures and memories of characters we don't know yet, just waiting to be picked up and discovered. I believe that is what our lives are like. Completed books with your name stamped on the cover but you're not allowed to binge the book all at once. The experiences and accomplishments yet to be lived are in the pages ahead which are under lock and key. The memories that you will forever cherish are just a few pages back and will always be there. While it's nice to look back you can't do it forever, because then your present chapters will be repeats of the past, and there's no growth in that. You can look back but not live there, or the brilliant story of your life will never be finished.

Time is an important role in these chapters. Every day, the ones you love and the things you cherish are always at risk of flaring and fading forever. We're not blessed with the gift of foresight and so have to live in the now, or risk losing what we have. It's terrifying to live with this knowledge, that you can have something one second and in the blink of an eye it can be gone. Stolen from you without so much as a chance to say goodbye. Time is so precious, you never quite appreciate that saying until something you had a moment ago is no longer yours.

Humans are always worrying about the next deadline, a lot of our pages will be the result of this waiting, or wasting, or wishing away time, you need to make the time you have count and try to escape life with as little of those worrying pages as possible. In our culture today, a lot of people wish away 50 weeks of their life for the bliss of a 2 week holiday. That's only 14 days of 364 that you are looking forward to, the only time you're making count. Animals have no concept of time, which is why when you leave the house for five minutes, they are excited about your return, they don't know how long you've been gone for. The time you spend with them means the world to their short lives, they have to make every second count. We need to lead by our pets' example and cherish every waking moment with the things and people we love, showing them love at every possible moment because you don't know when you'll turn the page and they won't be on it.

Time is the reason why we take photographs, for our life books. It's because we know that the image in front of us, in that moment, is going to disappear soon and turn to dust. The people, the scene, the event, none of it is eternal, but in a photograph, it can be. They capture a moment and while you wish you could jump back in and re-live it all again, it would never be the same, just like the pages in your book, pre the present chapter. Whether those people who you shared the past with are in your next chapter, you still need to turn the page. Remember all your firsts because you never know when they will be your last.

As I've said above, we grow and mature as we get older, and we can't live in the past, but we can look back, we can enjoy and appreciate what has come before. Just remember, whoever is reading this, don't forget what it was like to be a child, that carefree spirit needs to be carried into adulthood. The feeling of freedom and the ability to have fun in any situation. Don't forget what it was like to be a teenager, sympathise with those lost kids on the train making too much noise, they are trying to find their way in the world and haven't learned all there is yet, give them a break to be young. I like to think of my chapter headings as my ages so that I always remember how I grew in that year of my life. Remembering what I was like at different ages is like a map of progress. Too many people want to grow up too fast and end up losing the child within them. Don't let that happen to you, after all: 'There's no point being a grown-up if you can't act childish sometimes.'