Reflections of a 26 year old

I'm roughly one month away from turning 26, meaning I'm in my last period of being a 25 year old. I thought this would be a perfect time to review an older post of mine 'Twenty-Five before Twenty-Five'. It's been just under four years since I made that post and my life has changed drastically. I have new friends, new relationships, experienced highs and lows, started a new career, changed career paths, started a business, renovated a property, and so much more. But what I'm most interested in is just how many things I've ticked off my list from all those years ago...

1. Write and Publish a fiction novel.

2. Write and Publish a poetry collection.

3. Move out into your own flat and decorate it.

4. Achieved a PGCE qualification.

5. Have a Master’s Degree (or be working on it).

6. Be a full-time English Teacher.

7. Holidayed to Disney World, Florida (again).

8. Travel, Travel, Travel!

9. Be in a happy relationship, or at least have fallen in love.

10. Written a full-length stage play.

11. Still, making YouTube videos and maintaining this blog.

12. Get a tattoo.

13. Grown in self-confidence and acceptance/be my ideal weight.

14. Grow your social circle and be surrounded by great people.

15. Learn French.

16. Complete a short story collection.

17. Be more involved in both the theatre and publishing industry.

18. Learn to cook.

19. Learn to bake.

20. See more theatre shows.

21. Read all of the books on my bookshelf.

22. Get your driving license and a car.

23. Swim with dolphins.

24. Hot air balloon ride

25. Be Happy and Keep Dreaming

14 out of 25 is not too shabby, especially when I've got the rest of my life ahead of me. I'll be the first one to admit that I have always put a lot of pressure on myself; I've been like it my whole life. I started revising for my GCSE's in year 9 until I burned myself out. I studied so hard and so long for my A-levels that I almost had a breakdown. University was the same, as was my PGCE, as was my career as a teacher. My whole life I've worked hard but put a ridiculous amount of pressure on my shoulders to achieve things by such a young age, and be the absolute best at everything I set out to do. I used to think that mid 20's was old- really old. I used to think I had to have everything sorted out by my early 20s never mind my mid-late 20s. Now that I've reached this age however, not that I've flipped some magical switch and I'm now a wise old owl or anything, I've realised there is still so much time left for me to do all the things I want to do. Time is not running out. It may have taken me a long time to realise this but now the pressure has finally subsided.

Let's take a closer look at what I have ticked off, and what is still in progress or disregarded because as we grow, evolve, and change, so do a lot of our dreams and ambitions.

Firstly, including all of the creative ambitions in one:

1. Write and Publish a fiction novel.

2. Write and Publish a poetry collection.

10. Written a full-length stage play.

11. Still, making YouTube videos and maintaining this blog.

16. Complete a short story collection.

17. Be more involved in both the theatre and publishing industry.

These are all things I want to return to at one point, in fact recently I've been dedicating a lot more time to my novel and poetry collection. But my god, no-one can prepare you for how much of your time, energy, and life goes into teaching. My last blog post here was just before I began my teacher training in September 2020. That academic year of my life was the toughest, most challenging thing I've done. I had to quickly change from a shy, reserved, anxious girl into a tough, thick-skinned, assertive woman. Without this change I would've been eaten alive in the teaching profession. With all that being said, I had absolutely no free time in which to partake in any creative avenues; the training was truly all encompassing. I've recently taken a break from full time teaching in order to pursue my MA degree and start up my own tutoring business, and since this break I have been inundated with a feeling deep in the pit of my body that I need to get back to my creative pursuits. So, while they may not have been achieved by 25, who's to say they won't be by 30 or 35? There really is no deadline on my life path.

Next up, the travel and leisure goals:

7. Holidayed to Disney World, Florida (again).

23. Swim with dolphins.

24. Hot air balloon ride

Number 7 was very high up on my list and unfortunately time and money just haven't permitted this to happen yet. Not only was I incredibly busy during my teacher training, I then had to grow accustomed to my new job, start saving money that I hadn't previously had, and settle into my new life as a teacher. A lot of things have gotten in the way or had to take a priority over the sheer amount of money needed for a holiday to Disney, and thus it just hasn't happened for me yet. Similarly with the other two goals, I haven't holidayed anywhere in the last few years that have permitted either of these activities, but when the opportunity does arrive I will be grabbing it hands on.

Lastly, the two miscellaneous goals from the list:

12. Get a tattoo.

15. Learn French.

I can say I definiutely know MORE French than I did at the time of writing my original post, but to say I'm fluent is miles off from the truth- astronomically so. Duolingo was what I was using to learn and soon realised that the app is not the right fit for me, since then, I haven't really picked up the skill, nor do languages come very easy to me. This is probably one that, as much as I'd love to say I am fluent in another language, will sit dormant for a very long time. Regarding the tattoo, I still want to get one but I'm so indecisive that I haven't settled firmly on a design I want, but once I am positive, I will be seated in that tattoo chair ready to get a small, meaningful tattoo.

Now, let's take a look at the things I have accomplished...

3. Move out into your own flat and decorate it.

This one is a bit of a cheat because I haven't technically moved out. Let me explain. In 2022 I began living with my boyfriend in my parents home, very quickly we realised we could not continue living with two people in one very small bedroom. So, with the help of my partner and my dad we transformed the summer house in my parents backgarden into a livable guest house. We had a completely blank canvas so I got to choose the wall colour for the living space and bathroom, the floor tiles, the kitchen cabinets, the layout, and every piece of furniture inside. It was a long road to renovate the entire thing, and it was a hell of a lot of money as well, but considering the cost of living crisis we are in now, and the impossibility of buying a house (or event renting anywhere let's be real), I'm so glad we did it. No matter how small it may be in comparison to a flat or a house, it's ours, and I can say I decorated it exactly the way I wanted.

4. Achieved a PGCE qualification.

6. Be a full-time English Teacher.

From September 2020-June 2021 I started and completed my PGCE qualification and I gained QTS (Qualfied Teacher Status). Meaning I am a fully qualified English teacher. This year was incredibly challenging. I had classes that I shadowed and then eventually took over, I had to mark books and assessments for all year groups each half term, I taught all year groups, I started an afterschool club with a colleague, I had to be observed every week, write learning diaries on a variety of topics, had online work and tasks to complete every day, I had to have mentor meetings, set targets for myself and meet these targets, write three pieces of coursework all while teaching 5 days a week, complete investigative topics on classes and teaching styles, observe other colleagues in multiple different subjects, plan and write detailed lesson plans for every single lesson I taught, and so much more that I'm probably forgetting. I also had to do three months of my teacher training at home due to the COVID lockdowns, and learn the TEAMS software inside and out to be able to teach my classes.

It was a ridiculous time, probably the busiest of my life (even as a full time teacher) but one I wouldn't trade for the world. It made me a stronger person, it improved my own skills in literature and language just through the process of teaching it to others, it gave me lifelong friendships, and heartwarming student relationships. It honestly changed my whole life and whole personality for the better. I remember how nervous I was to start, and I remember a few weeks in thinking 'I can't do this.' but I'm so grateful that I stuck it out, and I'm so grateful to the amazing support system I had around me of fellow trainees and colleagues that have become some of my closest friends.

I got offered a job at my training school before I had even finished my course and spent two very happy years there. I got to work with my closest friends, grow my confidence, improve my teaching abilities, and become the person I was meant to be: outspoken, assertive, strong, and capable of anything.

5. Have a Master’s Degree (or be working on it).

With my BA degree in one hand, and my teaching degree in another, I knew I wanted to step up my game even further and study for my MA. So, after 3 years at my school (one year training and two years teaching), I handed in my resignation to take a year out to get my MA degree. I started my MA in September 2023, and will finish it by September 2024, so while I haven't got it yet I'm almost at the finish line. I have one final project left which is my dissertation, all other essays have been submitted for marking, and classes are over, so it feels very very close. I've been studying Literary Studies at Goldsmiths University in London and I have loved being back in classes, studying, and even writing the assignments; I guess its easy when you simply adore what you're studying. I've done a module in Romantic and Victorian Literature, World Literature, European Decadence, and Women's Writing, all of which have been incredible and I've enjoyed so much.

8. Travel, Travel, Travel!

This is a goal that I'm going to continue to do throughout my entire life. It's probably the thing that brings me most happiness. Since writing this list we obviously were a bit limited to where we could go because of the COVID lockdowns and restrictions, but as soon as travel was permitted I was on a flight! I've not been to loads of places but the trips I have been on have been amazing.

July 2021- Portsmouth, Village Hotel

October 2021- Portugal, Golden Beach Hotel

July 2022- Gran Canaria, Mogan Princess and Beach Club

August 2023- Fuerteventura, TUI Magic Life Hotel

February 2024- Amsterdam, WestCord City Centre Hotel

Each trip has been so memorable, extremely fun, and fuelled my wanderlust more and more. I can't wait to visit so many more places.

9. Be in a happy relationship, or at least have fallen in love.

2021 was the year of dating. It's when the COVID restrictions really started coming to an end, I had a bunch of new friends and amazing people around me, we were all single so we were going out together all the time, every weekend. I was also on the dating apps so if I weren't meeting people on nights out, I was arranging dates from the apps. I'll admit, I had a lot of fun in 2021 but I was still left with an overwhelming feeling of, 'when is someone going to want to stick around?' I was stuck with flings, one time dates, or people that just weren't serious enough about me. I had sort of given up on the idea of finding love but then in February 2022, completely off guard and unexpected, I went on a date with a guy I had been talking to for a few weeks, and by the next day (Valentines Day) he was asking me to be his girlfriend and we were absolutely smitten with each other. Nothing about our relationship felt too quick, nothing with him felt difficult, every single moment was as special as the last, and I had finally found what I'd been looking for.

Fastforward to two years and four months later, we live together in the guest home we renovated together, we have been through enough trails and tribulations to last a lifetime, we've grown as people and as a couple, we have two adorable cats together, we've travelled and experienced a lot of life together, and we're happy. I fell in love, I learned what it was to be loved, and I'm still as in love today as I was on the 13th of February when I first saw him.

13. Grown in self-confidence and acceptance/be my ideal weight.

If I'm honest with myself I'm not at all my ideal weight. Getting into a relationship means lots of dinners out and takeaways in, so I've definitely packed on the pounds. But, I've gained a much more positive view of my body, I've embraced exercising for fun and health instead of as a punishment to my body, and I've learned to love myself exactly as I am. I think being loved so wholly by someone else really does help you see yourself the way they see you, and when I used to talk badly about myself my boyfriend always says, 'don't talk about my best friend like that' which I think is really sweet. I love who I am, quirks and all, as much as he does, and I'm in a much healthier mental space than I was four years ago.

14. Grow your social circle and be surrounded by great people.

Through teacher training I have massively expanded my social circle. I have kept my best friend since secondary school and she will always be my number one, but on top of her I've created such an amazing group of people around me. These are lifelong friends, people who will be invited to my wedding, some of whom will be my bridesmaids, I can't do justice to how much these people mean to me. We've had crazy nights out, cute days in, holidays together, been there through the ups and downs of training, growing used to our jobs, and even when some of us have left the job. I've watched these people fall in love, go through huge milestones in their lives, sing at karaoke, knock back 5 shots in a row, fall over, laugh until they can't brethe or cry until they need a shoulder. When I tell you I adore these people, they are the world to me; even though we may not see each other as much now that we have all got into relationships, and a lot of us have moved on to other jobs, the time we had together from 2021-2022 of wild adventures, and the times we get to all hang out together- those are my favourite moments.

18. Learn to cook.

19. Learn to bake.

I'm not proclaiming to be a pro chef now or anything of the sort, but with my own kitchen to practice different meals and recipes, I've definitely improved from 2020. I used to not know how to make anything at all, now I will experiment with both meals and desserts. I love using my airfryer to try new things, such as my very own garlic bread (that is world renowned according to my partner), pastas, fry ups, cakes, cookies, and whatever else my imagination can cook up (otherwise known as the recipes I see on TikTok). I used to detest any form of cooking, but now I find it quite rewarding and something I enjoy more now than I ever have before.

20. See more theatre shows.

Again, stuck record here, but COVID disrupted a lot of things on this list. The first theatre show I was able to see once things began opening up again was on the 9th of July 2021, and since then I haven't seen too many, especially compared to other years in my life, but I have seen a few.

Amelie- Criterion Theatre 2021

The Tempest- Globe Theatre 2021

Pretty Woman- Savoy Theatre 2021

Back to the Future- Adelphi Theatre 2022

Grease the Musical- Dominion Theatre 2022

Mary Poppins- Prince Edward Theatre 2022

Book of Mormon- Prince of Wales Theatre 2023

Definitely want to jump back into seeing so many more theatre shows because it's something I miss doing as much as I was a few years prior.

21. Read all of the books on my bookshelf.

This is another one that is a bit of a cheat. I haven't read every single book on my bookshelf but that is because I've bought, and been gifted, a ridiculous amount of new books since then. I'm counting it as completed because in the last few years I have well and truly escaped my reading slump and I read ALL. THE. TIME. I've fallen back in love with reading, and devour books quite fevourisly at the moment. Especially with the degree I'm studying at the moment too, it means I'm accessing and reading a whole host of new literature. My goals each year is to read 25+ books and I have been doing very well with that goal and hope to keep it up as the years move forward.

22. Get your driving license and a car.

This is probably one of my biggest accomplishments ever, and I say that with 2 degrees in my hand and 1 in progress. Driving, for me, was the scariest thing I've ever done. My first driving lesson I don't think I moved over 10mph, I was so so nervous. I also found so many aspects of driving difficult, especially roundabouts and checking my mirrors. Eventually I figured it all out, and despite taking a few months of a break because I found the whole thing so overwhelming, I got back to it, bought a car in advance of passing, smashed my theory, and passed my practical first time. Now, I couldn't imagine life without my car. It has granted me a whole new sense of freedom, and there's nothing quite like rolling your windows down on a hot day, blaring your favourite songs, and singing top volume down the road. I love it, and I'm so glad I pushed myself through one of the scariest challenges of my life.

25. Be Happy and Keep Dreaming

And this is where we leave off today's blog post. I may not have achieved every thing I wanted to by the age of 25, but that's because we are all growing, changing, and blossoming at our own pace. I still have a hell of a lot of life left to get to where I want to be, and achieve the things I want. I do genuienly believe life works in mysterious ways and everything works out for you in divine timing- exactly when it is meant for you.

When I wrote that list, I couldn't imagine all the ways my life was going to change for the better, and all the things I would do and accomplish by this age. I have my own tutoring business, teaching experience, three degrees to my name, a boyfriend whom I love, friends who mean the world to me, a strong and supportive family, hobbies, interests and passions that will last a lifetime and that I will continue pursuing for a lifetime. My world is nowhere near as complete as I thought it would be by 25 and that's because no-one's is. I was under this impression that your life had to be fixed and secured by mid-twenties but now I realise, I'm only just getting started. So, am I happy? Yes. Am I going to keep dreaming? Absolutely.

Signing off,

Bobbie May Corleys